90min’s Definitive European Power Rankings: Week 4

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“Jack ranks the best teams in Europe”
Following a week in which:
– Timo Werner scored a pile of goals.
– SSC Napoli conceded a pile of goals.
– Borussia Dortmund lost to a pile of randomers. 
– Whitney dropped a pile of great songs from their new record “Forever Turned Around” (check it out. 
We, using quotes from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia season five, rank the best teams in Europe. 
We rank football teams all the time, dude! 
15) Borussia Dortmund (Down 13)

“Oh my god, this whole thing is a disaster…”

Well that was a disaster. 
A full blown ‘send relief aid’ level disaster. 
Borussia Dortmund drop a whopping 13 places in 90min’s Definitive European Power Rankings this week because they were beaten by Bundesliga new-boys UNION BERLIN (bet you couldn’t name any of their players) 3-1. 
DISASTER. 
14) Vitesse (New Entry) 

“How about your favourite food, what would that be?”
“Oh, milk-steak.”
“Hmm?”
“What?”
“Milk-steak.”
A lot like steak cooked in milk, Vitesse being on 90min’s Definitive European Power Rankings really shouldn’t be a thing. 
And yet, here we are: with Charlie Day eating milk-steak and Vitesse (the Chelsea C-team) on this week’s edition of the power rankings. 
They, weirdly, deserve to be too, because they’re, weirdly, sitting atop of the Eredivisie table – ahead of Ajax, PSV, etc. – after beating AZ Alkmaar 2-1 last weekend. 
13) Arsenal (Re-Entry) 

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“They’re duelling, okay? These are lawyers settling an argument by duelling it out.”

What. A. Duel. 

Sunday’s meeting between arch north London rivals Arsenal and Tottenham Hotspur was a pretty special, they played out a thrilling 2-2 draw.

The fact that Arsenal rallied from two goals down in the game is enough to earn them a place in 90min’s Definitive European Power Rankings this week, but expect Tottenham and Arsenal to duel all season in the power rankings and for a top three finish in the Premier League. 

‘Top three? Do you not mean top four?’

No. Be real with yourselves Man Utd and Chelsea fans. Be real. 
12) Ajax (Down 5) 

“We live and die by the crab Dee.” 

Ajax live and die by their policy of a top upheaval of their squad every season.
Ajax live and die by Total Fo

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